Never Been Unloved

I've always loved the song by Michael W. Smith called "Never Been Unloved," and I recalled it as I was looking at all the recent pictures of Nathanael being held in loving arms and gazed upon with adoring eyes this past month. Since the moment he was conceived he has never been unloved. When he wakes me up countless times in a night, he is still loved. When he shoots poop across my carpet while I'm changing his diaper, even then he is loved. Actually, this Christmas season reminds me that all of us are loved, all the time. Jesus' birth in a lowly manger showed how much we are loved. Jesus' death on the cross further proved the depth of His love. So be encouraged. You are loved. You have never been unloved. Nothing you could ever do could change that. No matter how unlovable you feel, or how crappy the deck of cards you are dealt, you are still being held in God's loving arms and being gazed upon with God's adoring eyes. Now there's a good reason to be joyful this season!

I wish you a Merry Christmas from my heart and home to each of yours!

Loved by Grandma Theresa!

Loved by his godparents.

Loved by his big brother.

Loved by his mother.

Loved by God.

Welcome to the Church, Nathanael!

This week, on the Feast of St. Nicholas, our sweet Nathanael entered the Church through the graces of baptism. He behaved like a little cherub, sleeping through the whole ceremony (which his mother was very thankful for!) My brother Jon and his lovely bride Debbie were the proud godparents. They flew in from Portland, and we were so happy that they could make it. Our older boys adored every minute playing with their fun aunt and uncle while they were here, and I know Nathanael will gently be guided to love and serve the Lord through their prayers as he grows up.

Nathanael with his proud godparents, Debbie and Jon.

Nathanael ready for his big moment of entering the church. If you look closely, you can see that his Mommy was ready with a pacifier in hand just in case :)

I am totally in love with this little angel-boy!

Fr. Sean blessing Nathanael with chrism oil, which has the most heavenly scent on earth. I avoided giving him a bath as long as possible because I wanted the sweet smell to linger on his precious head forever.

Fr. Sean blessing Nathanael's ears, that they may be open to God's Word, and his mouth, that he may speak the Gospel in truth and love throughout his life.

During the solemness of the ceremony, Dominic decided to pretend that the baptismal font was an aircraft carrier and his hand was a fighter jet. I was just thankful that he didn't go overboard and take a swim in the "ocean" of holy water!

Here's some of our friends who were kind enough to wake up at the crack of dawn to attend Nathanael's holy Baptism (it was right after the 7:00am Mass). I am so blessed with holy, encourageing friends, both near and far...you know who you are! :)

Please say a prayer for Nathanael, our newest little member of the Church, and for all of our children, that each of them may grow in wisdom as they grow in stature and learn to glorify the Lord with their lives. And while you're at it, you might as well say a prayer for Paul and I, that we be holy parents, and for Fr. Sean and all priests, that they faithfully shepherd the sheep in their fold.

Bathtime Bliss

If only Calgon could take me away to such a happy place! :)

Lame but Lovely Nonetheless

My parents called to wish us a Happy Thanksgiving while we were eating our meal that was completely prepared by our local grocery store. My dad, sincerely not meaning to make fun of us, said: "Oh yes, we bought one of those prepared meals for a needy family in town."

Nice.

I never thought of putting myself in the "needy" category, but this year I guess that sort of applies, and you know what, I'm OK with that. It's true that I'm needy of sleep with a newborn in the house. I'm also needy of the desire to cook--cooking is just not one of my gifts--and so I jumped at the opportunity of a store-prepared, stress-free Thanksgiving meal. I was thrilled not to have to cook, not to have to entertain, and simply to enjoy a lovely meal with my husband and boys. Perhaps next year I will step back up to the plate of my domestic duty of making a home-cooked Thanksgiving meal (or better yet, maybe we'll be invited to someone else's house for a home-cooked meal and I'll just bring a side dish or two), but this year I am content with our lame but lovely attempt at celebrating Thanksgiving. :)

Thank you, Lord, for the many blessings you have given our family. Cultivate in me a heart of gratitude all year long, in all circumstances, both good and bad, for all that comes from Your hand is a gift to help me grow in holiness. Amen.

Sending Warm Thoughts Your Way

Today it was 8 degrees BELOW zero with snow blowing sideways. It made me cold just looking out the window. But Nathanael didn't seem to mind a bit in his new snuggly teddy bear suit from his godparents (Thanks Uncle Jon and Aunt Debbie!) :) Looking at these pictures just makes me feel warm inside and out...hope they warm your heart too!

Too Cute for Color

I just love this sweet photo, and thought it would capture Nathanael's sweetness even more if I edited out the color. I'm certainly no photography expert, but I think some photos are just too cute for color :) Our sweet Nathanael has passed the one week mark, he is weighing in at a healthy 8 lbs now, and still has an angelic personality (I hope this means it is here to stay!) He rarely cries, but rather makes sweet squeaky noises (hence his nickname: "Mousey"), and he simply passes his awake time looking around at this new world he has found himself in and seems perfectly content with his new home outside of the womb. He is doing great sleeping at night, waking up every 3 or 4 hours to nurse, and usually goes right back to sleep so that mommy can get as much precious sleep as possible (O how I LOVE my sleep!) :) Paul has taken paternity leave from work since Nathanael was born, and he has truly been my hero helping to keep Nathanael on a schedule and helping in the middle of the night to get the little guy back to sleep when I'm simply too exhausted to do so. Paul has also been carting the older boys to and from school, getting the groceries, taking the boys to their Cub Scout meetings, and running random errands that need to be done. What a gift he has been, truly making the transition to four children a breeze thus far. Another huge help has been my faithful friends from my rosary group who have signed up to bring us meals every other day for the next 3 weeks!!! Meals are the greatest gift you can give to a sleep deprived, hormonal mother, and I feel beyond blessed to have such supportive friends. God is good.

Happy Homecoming

How sweet it was bringing Nathanael home from the hospital! We had been waiting for him for so long that it just seemed right to finally have him here. We celebrated in his nursery with sparkling apple cider in REAL wine glasses--which the boys thought was extra special :) After saying "cheers" and toasting to our newest member of the family, Michael insisted on reading a bedtime story to his baby brother. It was precious and it warmed this mother's heart to see how much Nathanael is loved by his siblings already. Nathanael listened very intently to Michael's story, and then it was time for everyone to go to bed. All of us were exhausted from all the excitement over the past few days...a happy, content exhaustion...a very happy, thankful homecoming. Thank you, Jesus.

The Wait is Over!!!

We proudly welcome Nathanael Russell into the world, our hearts, and our home!

Nathanael was born on November 10th, weighing 7 lbs. 3.8 oz. and measuring 20.5 inches long (our biggest baby yet...it must have been all that time on bedrest eating bon bons!) :) My labor officially started the previous day. I was having mildly painful contractions every 3 minutes apart most of the day on Tuesday, and I truly thought he would be born sometime that day or evening. We dropped our boys off at a friends' house that afternoon and headed to the hospital. When we arrived, my OB checked me and found that I was only dilated to about 2.5 cm, so she suggested that we do some more laboring in the comfort of our home before being admitted to the hospital. By now it was around supper time, so Paul and I decided to take the opportunity to go out on a date to our favorite Italian restaurant! :) I tried to enjoy the meal in between my contractions (which was quite comical), and then we went home and prayed the rosary together while doing laps around our living room and climbing up and down the stairs--now that's what I call productive praying! :) It was actually a very sweet time for Paul and me and a memory I don't think I'll ever forget. Then I decided to take a bubble bath, hoping that would relax me enough to speed the labor up a bit. Unfortanately, it had the exact opposite affect. My contractions became further apart and not as intense, so we decided to go to bed to get some rest while we could. On and off throughout the night I had contractions, but nothing painful enough or regular enough to rush us back to the hospital. In the morning, however, the contractions became quite regular again, a bit more painful, and I finally showed signs of losing my mucus plug. So off to the hospital we went again. At 8:00am I was dilated to 3 cm, and after sitting on a birthing ball for a little while, my contractions picked up speed and I quickly dilated to 4 cm. I had never used a birthing ball before, but it quickly became a close friend :) It really helped me to relax during the contractions, and I believe it helped tremendously with my dilation. My OB decided to break my bag of waters once I reached 4 cm, and then things really picked up the pace. I was able to relax in a hot jacuzzi for a little while (another first for me and something I highly recommend for relaxing and taking the edge off of the contractions), and within minutes I had dilated to 6 cm. Up until this point I had really been doing well at handling the contractions. I was really focused on offering up the pain of each contraction for a special intention, such as the salvation of my children, the holy souls in purgatory, those suffering with cancer, the holiness and happiness of my marriage, etc., and that really helped me to cope with each contraction knowing that the pain had a powerful and real purpose. Although it may sound strange, the pain of labor became a beautiful, grace-filled experience approaching it from this spiritual perspective. However, once I reached 6 or 7 cm the pain become more than I could gracefully handle anymore...my strategy of "offering it up" was replaced with being offered an epidural :} What I actually received was called an intrathecal, which is similar to an epidural but only takes the pain away for a shorter period of time. The shot worked beautifully, and within an hour or so I was fully dilated and ready to push. My nurse Lisa literally told me not to sneeze while she quickly paged my OB :) Thankfully, my amazing OB made it on time, and with only 3 repetitions of pushes, Nathanael was born! The hour was 3:00pm, which Catholics call the hour of Divine Mercy, and truly I felt God's mercy and goodness shower down upon me at that moment. And when my eyes saw my new son I can honestly say it was love at first sight! :) I was totally enamored with his bright little eyes and his wee bit of fuzzy strawberry blond hair. His hair color helped us determine what his middle name should be--Russell--which means "red one" and is also my maiden name which I've always been quite fond of :) I was able to hold and nurse Nathanael immediately, and from the start he has been such a sweet and mellow fellow (I pray that this will be his permanent temperament, but I suppose it's too early to tell yet). Needless to say, we are overflowing with joy and gratitude! God is so very, very good.

A relieved and happy mommy with her incredible OB and her new bundle of love!

Maria and Nathanael--first bond, forever bond.

Paul admiring his newest son.

The boys meeting their new brother for the first time--totally in awe, totally in love. Oh how I love these boys...all 5 of them!!! :)

Ready and Still Waiting

Today I hit the milestone of 37 weeks!!! Yay! After the fear of miscarrying the first 3 months and the fear of having a premature baby the last 6 weeks, I can't tell you how happy I am to reach this milestone. At my doctor's appointment this week I learned that I am 50% effaced and 1 and 1/2 cm dilated. I was excited about that news because at least all these contractions I've been having throughout the day are actually accomplishing something (other than making me anxious about whether or not I'm in "real" labor or not!). You'd think that after having 3 children I would know when it's time to pack up and head to the hospital, but I feel more clueless this time around than ever before. I think I'm just hyper-sensitive to all these Braxton Hicks contractions due to my preterm labor scare; therefore, every time I have a cluster of contractions I panic and think we need to rush to the hospital. For example, a few days ago I was having contractions 3 minutes apart for over 2 hours...but they never progressed into intense or uncomfortable contractions, so it was just a false alarm. How confusing and contrary to what all the pregnancy books say...GRRRR!!! :} This little guy has just been keeping us on our toes (or perhaps I should say on our knees) ever since he was conceived...God must have very special plans for him :)

Anyway, I am now in the true nesting mode since it is pretty much certain that our little guy will be making his grand entrance very soon :) Here are some photos of the nesting preparations I've been up to lately:

Borrowed a car seat (thanks Laura!) to bring our sweet bundle home in. I had no idea that car seats expire every 5 years! We were planning on using the same one we had used for our last 3 boys until someone pointed out that it is probably WAY expired--which it was. I am so glad my friend Laura had an extra one to lend us so that we didn't have to spend a bucket-load of money on a new one. What a blessing.

Packed the hospital bag...complete with freshly washed baby clothes, nursing gown, clothes, and comfy slippers for me, new binkies, and a warm winter hat to keep baby's head warm and to hide his little cone head if he gets one like his 3 older brothers did :)

My mom helped me repaint and decorate the nursery while she was here (thanks, Mom---you know you did most of the work!). I am thrilled with how it turned out. I love the aviation/patriotic theme which I have used with all of our boys, but this is the first time I was bold enough to paint the walls in patriotic colors. Looking at the room, it's fun for me to reminisce about what I made for each of the boys when they were born. I made the crib bumper for baby Joseph, the wall hanging for baby Michael, a matching crocheted blanket for baby Dominic, and this little guy gets...

...his very own name designed on the wall!

So for you lucky blog readers of mine, you get the first unveiling of our baby's first name (the middle name is still being debated) :) Paul and I chose this name from the beautiful story of Nathanael in the New Testament (Read John 43-50), which is also where we got the unique spelling of the name. Nathanael was one of the first to proclaim Jesus as the Messiah, and he was also one of the chosen 12 disciples (in the other 3 Gospels they use the name Bartholomew, which was Nathanael's surname...so Bartholomew and Nathanael are really the same person...just a random FYI to make you Scripturally smarter) :)

4th Annual Saintly Celebration

What a fun and saintly celebration we had last night! Four of our dearest Catholic families came to celebrate with us, and Paul started the evening leading us all in a Litany of the Saints prayer, followed by the meal blessing. We all enjoyed a "heavenly" feast of food and then Joseph and Michael led the group at the piano in singing a few songs of praise to God and the saints. We then played a few saint games so that the children could win some treats, and then we finished the night with our pinata grand finale. This year's pinata event was truly a marathon because the boys and I put a few too many layers on our pinata, making it nearly impossible to crack the darn thing open. After quite a few rounds of all the kids taking a swing, Paul eventually cut a hole in the pinata and dumped all the goodies on the eagerly awaiting little saints (thankfully, they didn't mind a bit how the candy came out in the end!) :) I think an edifying and fun time was had by all, and I was so thankful our baby in the womb cooperated (as in, "stayed put") so that we could host the party! Here are some pictures of the festivities.

P.S. For those interested in where I got many of the ideas for our All Saints Day traditions, most of them came from this fabulous Catholic resource: "A Year With God: Celebrating the Liturgical Year" from Catholic Heritage Curricula.

This year Paul dressed as St. John Vianney, Maria as St. Gianna Mola, Joseph as St. Martin de Tours, Michael as St. Francis Xavier, and Dominic as St. George.

Here is Michael dressed as St. Francis Xavier, the patron saint of foreign missionaries, who traveled all over the globe setting the world on fire with the gospel.

Here is Joseph dressed as St. Martin de Tours, the patron saint of soldiers, who once shared his cloak with a beggar. God revealed to him in a dream that he had really shared his cloak with Christ which led to his conversion to Christianity.

Here is Dominic, the mighty St. George, who legend says slayed a dragon or perhaps more accurately defeated some evil heresy of his time. I'm not sure St. George had the assistance of hand grenades like Dominic is donning, but Dominic insisted on having them as part of his costume :)

Michael (St. Francis Xavier), Agnes (St. Bernadette), and Dominic (St. George) were our saintly greeters, waiting for the other guests to arrive.

Here is Michael leading us in a couple of songs: "Oh How I Love Jesus," and "I've Got That Joy, Joy, Joy."

Joseph led us in singing "Immaculate Mary," and "Oh When the Saints Go Marching In." If you look closely you may be able to see the littlest children at the party dancing in the background as we sang...so cute!

Here is Greg (St. Peregrine) and his son Benedict (a Lion, the symbol of St. Mark) taking a mighty swing at the pinata. Little Benedict was our youngest contestant but loved participating just like the big kids :) Oh, and in case you were wondering, no, our pinata is NOT a colorful pineapple. Rather, it supposed to look like a beautiful globe that is ablaze to remind us that saints are called to set the world on fire with Christ's love! :)


And here is the biggest kid, Joseph (St. Martin) winding up like a true slugger. Despite his great swing and strong muscles, not even he could break open our flaming globe...

However, "all things are possible with God"... :) so Paul (St. Vianney) came to the rescue to keep our little saints happy. There were plenty of treats and toys for all the kids to fill their goody-bags so that not a one of them missed the idea trick-or-treating. This was way more fun than knocking on people's doors in the frigid 40 degree Montana weather anyway! :)

Happy All Saints Day!!!