12 weeks prego and your vote please

 

So now that there is finally a baby-bump to show, I asked my husband to take a picture :)  I am so happy to be safely through the 1st trimester, even though I know I still have a long way to go.  I will be even more relieved once I'm past 15 weeks (which is how far along I was when I miscarried our baby Sebastian).  I am also eager to get past the nausea-phase, which is usually over around 14-16 weeks.  However, my nausea started a week or two earlier this time around, so I'm hoping that means it will also end earlier (which is probably wishful thinking on my part, but a girl can dream can't she?!)

 

People keep asking me if I feel the same this pregnancy as I did with my previous ones with the boys.  I would have to say "yes" for the most part, which leads me to believe we will be blessed with another boy.  My nausea is about the same intensity:  24 hours a day flu-like feeling but rarely throwing up.  The only difference is that is started at around 5 weeks this time (with my other pregnancies it started at 7 weeks).  And the only other difference that I've noticed is that I'm more emotional this time.  The first two weeks of this pregnancy I was in tears around the clock.  Even songs on the Christian radio station would make me cry.  My emotions have balanced out a little bit over the last few weeks, which my family is very grateful for!  :)  I'm guessing much of the tears had to do with pregnancy hormones and feeling like throwing up 24/7, but some of it was probably due to the fact that this pregnancy was a bit more of a surprise than my others.  Surprise?  I know, I know...being a veteran NFP user, you would think there would be no surprises in the baby making department, but that's simply not the case.  I'll try to explain. There is a big difference between using fertile days to try to conceive and using days on the edge of your fertile window as a way to remain open to life.  My husband and I try whole-heartedly to follow the Church's teachings regarding NFP, which means we try to remain open to the gift of life and to not use NFP as a means of contraception unless there is a very serious reason for avoiding pregnancy.  There have been times when we've had serious reasons to postpone a pregnancy, but we were not in one of those seasons recently, so we were using days in my cycle that were a little bit fertile in order to be open to God's will for our family size.  For months we didn't get pregnant, so I was slightly surprised when I missed my period in August.  Totally suprised?   No, certainly not. NFP didn't fail. We knew it was a possibility to be pregnant. And therein lies the beauty and the challenge of NFP: it leaves God in control. And since we have a God who loves us and is trustworthy, why not let Him send surprises?  The surprise factor, however, mentally made it a bit harder for me to become elated right away.  Of course I was happy, just like I was with our other pregnancies, but because we were not actively trying to conceive, it took more time to let go of the anxieties that come with having another child.  When you're trying to get pregnant, you have mentally already tackled most of those anxieties before you conceive.  With all our other pregnancies, we were actively trying to conceive, so it was easier to be excited right away.  I'm not sure if that makes sense to anyone but me, but that's part of the reason that I think I've been so emotional this pregnancy.  Surprises from God just take a little bit longer to process, even though they are just as wonderful because God only gives what is good, right?!  :)

 

OK, sorry if that above paragraph was way too much information!  You have to keep in mind that blogging is like therapy for me...it's how I work through things, and sometimes I inadvertantly take my readers along for the ride...sorry!   Hopefully you're learning along with me though! :}

 

So on a lighter note, last week I had my second ultrasound, and what a joy it was to see that bouncing baby in my womb!  At my first ultrasound I was only at 6 weeks, so all I could really see was a beautiful heartbeat inside a tiny little stationary body.  My 12 week ultrasound was totally different...there were little arms and legs and I'm pretty sure I saw a trampoline in there that the baby was bouncing on! :)   It made all that nausea so worth it!  I couldn't believe how active the baby was...it was like he or she just drank a Mr. Dew.  Hopefully that was not a premonition of how hyperactive this little one will be outside of the womb! :} Anyway, it was a beautiful sight and it really helped me to embrace this pregnancy, this new little person, with all of my heart.  Yes, God is very good indeed.

 

And now on a totally unrelated topic...  I was wondering if you would mind helping me make a decision???  This pregnancy is making my face break out (especially on my forehead), so I am tempted to get bangs...lots of bangs (see photo below).  I've done side-swept bangs before and immediately vowed to never to do that again.  But this time I'm thinking of full bangs to hide my pregnancy acne.  My big concern is that it would make me look younger, which I want to avoid since I still get carded for alcohol at age 33.  Plus, my husband is predominantly grey, so I really don't want to look like I'm his daughter.  That would be very bad.  So I'd love to get some second opinions on what I should do.  Would you please cast your vote for "bangs" or "no bangs" in the comment box to help me decide?  Thank you :)